i desperately want to speak spanish fluently, it just hit me while watching "vicky christina barcelona", i'd never really wanted to learn at all until i heard it in that movie and since then the desire has only grown and grown.

things i could do right now that would be beneficial:

[1] do my questions&answers thing for english, meaning ask 2 questions per paragraph of the essay we're studying and answer them. it won't be too bad because i thoroughly enjoy and understand the essay, the author's point in the essay is her opinion that one does not need a college degree to be successful and too many young people nowadays are thinking that a college degree is the gateway to success thus cluttering up colleges and seeing them as 4 years of time before starting their real life full of money and opportunities. i agree with her, i don't necessarily know if i will stay in college, i want to have that education but i'm just not sure it will make me happy, i don't want to waste 4 years of unhappiness just so i can say i have a degree or so people will respect my opinions more. especially with all this endtimes talk. im' just very laidback i think. 

[2] make a list of each of the essay requirments for the 4 more essays we will do to hang up by my desk so i can be htinking on them throughout the semester.

i thought i was doing bad in this class but i get there today and there are people that didn't even type their essay up, who only filled half a page who are generally just not giving it very much thought. though i'm not busting my butt or freaking out i am giving it my best try, i'm not going to stress myself out to make it perfect. i'm doing what is required to the best of my normal ability and am doing okay for not having written an essay ever before.

i think i'll just watch tv and wait for my headache to go far far away.

status of crush: still hoping.

stop it chelsea you freaking fool he hasn't even TALKED to you, obviously he does not feel anything at all for you at all.

so stop. you're a dumb girl.