eek my head's reallly dizzy, it's hard being on the computer. i just leanred that my final exam is on december 17, i thought it would be way earlier! dang....i'm so done with this class.

i have to write a first draft before tomorrow morning for this essay on whether or not we should medicate children for depression...

but lillie's sleeping on my bed and i really just want to get in bed with her and watch the CSI's that I recorded...

i decided to try and eat better. and since i haven't really been going to the gym (phase over maybe i no rite) i mainly laze around the house.

i keep gaining weight and i keep watching what i eat, the portions and shiz but it keeps slowly raising. it makes me sooo mad. this all started in the summer when my mom and i would eat alot at night and it's just increased and i'm eatin wayyyy less.

doesn't make sense.

i'm not fat, but i feel really fat. like my mom is all "you looks so much better, you were wayyy too skinny before" but all i think when she says that is i want to go back to that plz.

sure my boobs have increased, and my hips, i'm all scarjo'd up but i still feel fat. none of my jeans fit my new womanly hips.

so yeah. eating better, and doing "yoga" meaning inventing it on my own since i don't want to pay for anything.

jsut laying about on the floor stretching myself in awkward silent positions.

it'll be good, to eat better...and it'll make me feel better for lazing so much. i'm just so tired all the time, physically and mentally.

eating crap and laying in bed = the super overweight people on TLC