So we bought the plane tickets for next Wednesday, bought some more suitcases, I told friends I was leaving. And then they talked and my mom felt God pulling her to stay. Even though she wants to go, she feels God pulling her to stay and she has no peace.

When she came back to my room to tell me that last night, I told her I had never been so mad at her before.

After the last time she did it, changed her mind and hurt me so much I trusted her this time. I was already packing away outfits in my mind, thinking about what I'm going to do there (libraries) picking out which DVD's to bring and why, trying to cover all the bases. I was planning everything, even college and when she changed her mind it's like my life crumbled. I finally had direction, I knew where I was going and I could plan but not only is that all down the pooper I have no idea now, there is now second plan. I'm back sitting around waiting for God knows what. We could be livingin San Antonio, or anywhere else.

So yeah, I feel blank. Real blank.

But I watched "Australia" last night and it was SO GOOD. I don't care what anyone says, even though it bombed and blah blah blah. I loved ittttttttt. Soooo gooododdddd. Hugh Jackman was a good man in the movie, I like good men, I like thinking "oh my FH needs to be like that guy" and he was a good guy.

FH= future husband